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…and for once I’m not talking about finding a job (though I do need that too). I’m talking about my issues. Yes, I have issues…several of them. Some are not appropriate to discuss here. The ones that are can pretty much be boiled down to two categories.

1. Time management – I don’t understand where all my time goes. (Maybe it’s spent wondering where my time goes?) I should have all the time in the world to do the hundreds of things I want to do, and yet at the end of the day I’m left with a long list of things yet to be done and a big blank on the “things I did today” side. I could blame the internet. My instinct is to name it the spawn of the devil and feign a lack of willpower to resist its beckoning call. But I know that’s not entirely true. The problem is really…

2. Lack of motivation – I get dumpy. I wallow in self-pity over my lack of luck in the job department and envision a lifetime of woe to follow due to my incredibly unprofitable taste in professions. It’s hard to get motivated to do the laundry when you’re busy worrying about how in the world you’ll ever be able to save enough for retirement after you’ve swallowed your pride and taken that minimum wage job at Meijer. And I’m only 32. Yeah, I worry…A. Lot. And all of that worry sucks my will to do…anything. I haven’t felt creative in quite a while…not productively creative anyway…you know, the kind of creativity that leads to something tangible. I haven’t posted here much because I feel like all I would be doing is complaining, and I don’t want to turn this place into a pity party. This is supposed to be my happy place.

So…solutions? I’ve tried setting a schedule for myself, but I’m self-defeating. I say to myself, “F@#k you and your schedule!” like I’m both the authority figure and the angst-ridden teenage girl. (hmm…that may actually be a pretty good description of myself) I like the idea of a schedule, but I don’t know how to make myself follow it. Suggestions? Do you ever struggle with motivation? How do you deal with it? How do you manage your time and ensure your to-do list is shrinking rather than growing?

Okay, enough mopey bullshit. Just to prove that it’s not all gloom and doom around here, I’ll share some pics of the kitties. Kitty pictures make everything better, right?

 

 

Remember these guys? They’re getting big. They had a checkup yesterday and should be ready for adoption in another two weeks. Oh, and they have names! The grey tiger striped one is George. We call him Georgy-Porgy. The light grey and white one is Fred. And the calico one is Kahlia, Kali for short (of course). She’s a sweetheart. Very loving.

 

 

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